You have just won one million dollars:

1. Who do you call first? A lawyer.

2. What is the first thing you buy for yourself? Zero debt.

3. What is the first thing you buy for someone else? (you know who you are) Also zero debt.

4. Do you give any away? If yes, to whom? Yes. To PAWS, to EFF, to the NRA.

5. Do you invest any? If so, how? Yes. Conservative index funds.